


Of Rage and Revenge

by nanuk_dain



Series: Of Soldiers and Secrets [14]
Category: Band of Brothers
Genre: Angst, Established Relationship, M/M, mild violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-09-07
Updated: 2011-09-07
Packaged: 2017-10-23 12:33:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,207
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/250358
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nanuk_dain/pseuds/nanuk_dain
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sometimes, it's just too much. Or: When Grant is shot, Doc Roe watches Captain Speirs struggle for control.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Of Rage and Revenge

  
[   
](http://pics.livejournal.com/nanuk_dain/pic/0008xqg1)   


 

“Medic!”

The shout came only moments before a private burst through the door. Eugene was on his feet and moving before he had even thought about it, grabbing his bag and running out towards the jeeps. His reaction to that word was so deeply ingrained that it had become an instinct, even here in Austria where he wasn't needed that often anymore.

They drove at breakneck speed and reached their destination within minutes. Eugene was out of the jeep before it had even stopped, jumping over the side and running towards the motionless body on the muddy street. He ignored Talbert sitting next to Grant, just focussed on his work, doing the best he could to keep Grant alive. He didn't want anybody else dying under his hands. Not now that the war was over.

They got Grant on the jeep and headed for the sports hall that served as an improvised aid station – only that it was empty, there hadn't been many gravely wounded since they'd arrived in Austria. Eugene was surprised to find Captain Speirs waiting for them at the entrance, his expression dark and dangerous, a deep frown on his face. The man wordlessly took the handles of the stretcher while Talbert took the other side and they carried Grant inside, Gene walking next to them with the plasma bottle in his raised hand.

The Captain displayed a great deal more control than Eugene had expected him to show. He was wound up tight as a spring, everybody could sense that, but obviously his first priority was getting done what had to be done to get Grant to survive. He held back when Eugene had been worried he'd explode. When the surgeon had told them there was no hope for Grant in this flippant tone of voice that showed that he couldn't care less if his patient lived or died. Eugene watched how the Captain gritted his teeth, obviously tempted to physically hurt the surgeon, but then he seemed to come to a decision and regained his focus. Only seconds later, they were back on the road.

When, after what seemed an eternity but was only half an hour according to Eugene's watch, they'd found the German brain surgeon, Gene remained seated on the hood of the jeep, the plasma bottle still firmly in his raised hand, and he wondered what the Captain intended to do. The German surgeon opened the door after only a minute, and the Captain forced him outside with his gun raised. The surgeon wasn't intimidated that easily, though, and within seconds he proved that he cared more for his patient, no matter what his nationality, than he was concerned about an angry soldier with a weapon. Eugene couldn't help feeling respect towards the man, but he wasn't sure how much more the Captain was willing to take before he would hurt somebody.

Gene watched how the muscle in Captain Speirs' jaw twitched and worried that it wouldn't take much more to break his restraint. He respected the Captain, but Gene had always been able to see the violence that ran close under the surface, held in check only by Speirs' tight control. He was sure that none of them wanted to know what would happen should it ever fail.

The way to the hospital took only a few minutes, and the surgeon proved his word right by manoeuvring at a speed and with a certainty neither Gene nor Captain Speirs could have managed. Eugene and the Captain followed the stretcher inside the hospital, but in the hallway, they were held back by a resolute nurse. It was obvious that there was nothing more they could do. Eugene had passed on everything he knew to the surgeon on the drive, and now it was up to the hospital staff to save Grant. Before the surgeon disappeared through the doors to the operation room, he gave a reassuring nod to repeat without words what he'd already said on the ride: He thought Grant could make it.

Eugene remained behind the Captain, watched his restless, barely controlled movements. They spoke of too much pent up energy, of rage, of indecision. It lasted only a few moments, though, then the Captain's posture straightened, and it was as if Gene could see the cold aggression settle over him like a blanket. He turned, his face a mask of barely controlled rage, his eyes burning, and Gene felt a shiver run down his spine. When he passed Eugene with brisk, angry steps, the Captain pressed out between clenched teeth, “I will kill that piece of shit.”

This would turn ugly pretty quickly, Gene just knew it. He had a bad feeling about this, so he turned on his heel and hurried after the Captain, not only because he needed a ride back anyway, but also because there was only one person who Eugene thought might be able to contain Captain Speirs' violent streak, and he had to get to them before the Captain's restraints snapped for good.

He had to find Lieutenant Lipton.

“Captain, can you take me back with you?” Eugene asked, taking good care to mask the worry in his voice and his eyes. The Captain looked up from where he was about to climb into the jeep, stared at Gene for a long moment, the he gave a curt nod without ever saying a word. Gene jumped in, and the Captain had pulled out before he was even properly seated. They were back at the hotel after only a few minutes, and the Captain stopped in front of the stairway and was gone as soon as he'd turned off the motor. He took two steps at a time, gun ready in his hand, and he disappeared into the hall before Gene had even reached the bottom of the stairs.

Eugene broke out in a run. He had to find the Lieutenant _now_ , or it was going to be too late. For once in his life, he was really lucky, because he almost ran into the man he was searching when he turned the corner to the officers' quarters on the first floor. Eugene ground to a halt, actually grabbing the Lieutenant's arm in order to avoid losing his balance.

“Lieutenant Lipton!”

“Eugene.” Lipton had a worried frown on his face. He'd never seen Gene so agitated. “What is it?”

“Grant was shot.” Gene replied while already pulling him towards the stairs. “And the Captain is on the edge.”

Lipton had fallen into step with him before Eugene even had the chance to finish his sentence. He understood, just like Gene had known he would. “Lead the way.”

Eugene walked in long strides, the dread rising with every second.

“How is Grant?” Lipton asked while they hurried down the flight of stairs.

“He was shot in the head by a drunken soldier, sir.” Eugene replied quickly. “The Captain ordered the men to find the shooter.”

Lipton was quiet for moment when they turned towards the hall where they could already see a cluster of men gathered. “Find him dead or alive?”

“I don't know, sir.” Gene didn't add that it could go both ways. The Lieutenant knew that just as well as he did.

It was eerily quiet when they approached the room. Gene followed Lipton who headed straight for the door, as if he knew that Captain was there. He pushed the door open and entered, the men clearing the way for him silently. Eugene stopped behind him and couldn't help breathing in sharply when he took in the scene inside the room. The man who'd shot Grant, more a child, really, sat on the chair in the back of the room, beaten bloody and surrounded by the men. The Captain stood right in front of him, the lines of his body tense, his gun pointed at the shooter's head.

It was as if the Captain knew Lipton was there, knew without turning, without seeing him. His arm began to shake ever so slightly, and Gene knew that it was caused by the strain to keep himself from pulling the trigger. Then the Captain looked at the blood on his hand and his gun, smeared it on the private's shoulder and turned away from him. His gaze found Lipton's, their eyes locked for a moment, and Gene felt as if they were having an entire conversation, before the Captain closed his eyes and took a deep breath, pulling his cap off his head. The tension didn't entirely leave his body, but it receded.

The Captain turned and made his way towards the door, back straight and steps stiff, saying to nobody in particular, “Have the MPs take care of that piece of shit.”

Eugene felt the agony in the air, felt the men realising that Grant must have died, and it was Talbert who actually dared to ask. “Grant's dead?”

“No.” The Captain stopped, turning back and holstering his gun, and he didn't look that murderous any more. “Kraut surgeon says he's going to make it.”

Gene watched the Captain leave the room, passing Lipton and giving him another short glance, before he disappeared through the door without saying another word. The Lieutenant turned to follow, his concerned gaze finding Eugene's. “Gene, please, take care of the men.”

Eugene just nodded and stared after the Lieutenant's retreating form, relief slowly setting in. This had been a close call.

Very close.

***

Ron felt the cold air wash over him when he left the building. He didn't stop until he'd reached the parapet of the terrace that overlooked the lake. It was dark, only the reflection of the moonlight indicated where the water was. Ron leaned against the low stone wall, taking a deep breath. Inside, he'd felt as if the walls had been suffocating him, as if the only relief was to take the life of that worthless bastard who'd shot Grant. It had taken him everything to turn away without the satisfaction of knowing that damn replacement dead.

Behind him, Ron heard footsteps, approaching him slowly, but he didn't bother to turn around. He'd known Carwood would follow him. A moment later, a familiar silhouette leaned against the parapet about a foot away from him without saying a word. They stood in silence, and Ron was astonished how well Carwood knew him, knew that Ron couldn't have dealt with physical contact, with meaningless conversation. All he needed was Carwood's reassuring presence beside him, knowing that he was there.

Ron couldn't have said how much time had passed before Carwood spoke. His gaze was directed at the darkness, somewhere at the lake, and his words were soft and quiet, meant only for Ron's ears. “Thank you.”

It took Ron a moment to find his voice. It felt as if he hadn't spoken in years. “What for?”

Carwood didn't look at him, and Ron was grateful for it. “For not pulling the trigger.”

“I should have.” he replied, his voice as quiet as Carwood's. “He deserved it.”

Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Carwood nod. “Maybe he did.”

“Then why do you thank me?” Ron asked into the darkness.

Carwood was silent for a moment, then he sighed deeply and turned to face him. “The war is over, Ron. We are expendable, now.”

Ron nodded. “I know.”

“They would have you court-martialled you had you shot him.” Carwood's eyes were filled with sincere worry, and it made Ron's insides clench to know that it was for him.

“I know.” He said again, then he added, “That wasn't what stopped me, though.” For a moment, Ron was worried that Carwood might actually ask him what had. He himself knew, but he wasn't certain he wanted to say it aloud.

As if he was aware of it, Carwood didn't ask. He caught Ron's gaze and held it, eyes serious. “Whatever the reason, I'm just glad you didn't shoot.”

Ron nodded slowly, but didn't reply. He felt a shiver run down his back, the same shiver he'd felt when he'd become aware of Carwood's presence in the room at the hotel, when he'd had his gun pointed at the replacement's head, ready to end his life. When, for the first time in his life, he'd become aware that he had a reason _not_ to pull the trigger.

Ron turned to look over the lake again, and the silence stretched between them for a long time. It wasn't uncomfortable, it was the kind of silence you can only have with people who understand you without words. He'd had that kind of silence with Carwood ever since their first meeting, Ron recalled, and it had only become more comfortable in the course of time. It was part of the reason he hadn't fired. As was Carwood's honest affection, his calm reassurance, his fierce loyalty. His smile that made his whole face radiant, made his eyes glow. Ron never wanted to be the cause for that smile to disappear.

He took a deep breath and turned to look at Carwood. “You are worth far more than that bastard's death.”

When Carwood smiled, that silent smile only Ron got to see, he knew he'd made the right decision.

**Author's Note:**

> The beautiful banner was made by Megan_Moonlight!


End file.
